Monday, June 23, 2008

One Hundred (and one) Minutes

Last night Chip and I engaged in some sexy pillow talk:
Him: Seriously though- what do you do for an hour and forty minutes every morning? What could possibly take that long? And how come you're always running late?
Me: I have no idea! I'm just slow in the mornings!

To satisfy his curiosity, I carried around a pencil and paper this morning to keep track of my activites. I see no reason to just show him the log I kept, not when I can embarass myself by posting it here!

6:00- 6:17: Shower (no shaving), astringent and lotion on the face.

6:17-6:24: Here's when I'm not at all efficient. During this time, I checked my email. Dee posted a new MySpace blog, so I read that. Then I wandered into the kitchen for a swig of Diet Coke and stumbled upon all the new vitamins Roy brought for the kids. After getting a good laugh over the prospect of Connor eating a fish oil tablet, I decided to try one of the chewable multi-vitamins. Not bad. Maybe I should start taking them. Dude- I need to get moving.

6:24-6:32: Time to iron my clothes. Maybe I could save a few minutes in the morning by doing this at night. But since I usually figure out what I'm going to wear while I fall asleep, I doubt that will work.

6:32-6:35: Visit the can. I'm not as slow in there as I thought!

6:35: Connor wakes up.

6:36-6:40: Connor and I sit on the couch together, discussing how many more birthday presents he gets to open and when he might get to open them. Eventually Blue's Clues replaces me as a focal point and I sneak back upstairs.

6:41-6:48: As soon as I get up there, Chloe wakes up. She and I spend this time admiring the butterflies on her curtains, then looking out the window at all the toys in the backyard that were not put away properly the night before. Eventually I get her to go potty and then park her in front of Blue and Joe with her brother.

6:48-7:00: Finally dry my hair and brush my teeth.

7:00-7:06: Put lotion on my whole body and Visine in my gooey allergy eyes.

7:06-7:17: Apply make-up and randomly look through my closet for this one black dress, even though I've already picked out and ironed today's outfit.

7:17-7:27: Iron my hair, then put special lotion on my elbows and heels. During this period of time, I hear a wail from Connor and a frustrated "But you didn't even chew it!" from Chip. I correctly guess that this was the moment Chip introduced the fish oil tablet.

7:27-7:41: Let the kids and Chip know I'm ready to head towards the car. As they get shoes on, I try on three different necklaces, find my shoes, pack up my lunch (which I had prepared the night before) and clean up a few of the outside toys Chloe and I had observed before. And we're off! I even arrived at work with five minutes to spare.

So Chip, the answer to your question is: I still don't know what it is that takes an hour and forty minutes every morning.


Unknown said...

Why all the lotion? Do you swim the English Channel to work every morning?

Memphis Urban Sketchers said...

That all sounds very reasonable to me. Except the ironing. What is it with you people and ironing your clothes? I iron maybe 4 times a year, maybe, and that includes both my clothes & T's. I am THAT GOOD at doing laundry. Also, please advise me on what kind of special lotion you use for heels & elbows - that sounds interesting.

Stacey Greenberg said...

i don't understand people who wake up and don't brush their teeth immediately!

and checking email? are you kidding me? what do you do at work all day? :)

i should do my morning routine. it takes me 30 minutes tops. even if warren is out of town and i have to get the kids ready by myself.