Friday, March 23, 2007

It's Not Possessive!

So earlier this year I vowed to post more, in the form of lists. Then Chip didn't like my list about a TV show, and my momentum was lost. (It's probably best to leave the list-making to the professionals anyway.)

But some days I just don't want to tell you treacly stories about how cute my kids are. Today is one of those days. So here is a short list of my strongest, most irrational pet peeves.

1. Men who condescendingly refer to their wives as "the boss" and talk about how much trouble they're going to be in if they do so-and-so (have a beer with their friends, watch the game rather than going to a couples dinner party, etc.). If your wife is so petty, and your interests are so conflicting, then why did you marry her? If you know she's going to get mad, why are you doing it anyway? And if you don't mean any of it, then why are you driving me crazy! Ugh!

2. When anyone touches my knees.

3. Men who have longish, manicured fingernails. (I'm talking about you, Sayid.) For some reason I can't control, I have an intense negative reaction to this. So if you're one of these men, I apologize for the involuntary shudder you saw when we first met.

4. Misuse of apostrophes. I'm no grammar perfectionist, but this is my pet peeve of all pet peeves. If you are making a word possessive, you need an apostrophe. If you're making it plural, you DO NOT. For example: We had a perfectly lovely meal at Bari a few weeks ago, right up until they handed us their newsletter. Apparently they now have Martini Monday's! That's right, $5 martini's on Monday nights this month. I want to know- how did "nights" get spared in this massacre? Fortunately the food was good enough that I can overlook this. And it didn't hurt that those martini's were strong, either.


Anonymous said...

I know! The worst is misuse of its/it's. I understand it's confusing because "its" is possessive, but come on people. If you can say "it is" in its place, then use an apostrophe. If not, then don't! How hard is that?! Sorry, I'm okay now.

Unknown said...

Whats the deal with your knee's?

Anonymous said...

Were you somehow in on Arkansas's new punctuation law? :)

The Saucier said...

My number one pet peeve? People not letting me touch their knees.