Makeup

I love makeup. I believe society gave women makeup to atone for all the crap we got screwed on. I mean really- when most men wake up in the morning, they look in the mirror and pretty much know what they are going to look like for the rest of the day. Not me- I get to even out skin tone, make my eyelashes look longer, and cover blemishes. I feel so lucky! And you should too, knowing you'll never have to see the hot mess that greets me in the mirror at 6:00 a.m.

Recently, before a big event, a friend said, "Please do my makeup! I want mine to look like yours. You're so gorgeous and smart and well dressed! And a great mother to your kids!"

My memory of the event is possibly a little fuzzy, but I definitely remember doing her makeup. Not long into the process, she said, "Uh, why are you curling my lashes? I don't have mascara on yet!" I explained to her that that's just how it's done. "No, that doesn't make any sense. I need mascara first." I sighed under the weight of the irony and continued applying her makeup, afraid to argue lest she make me stop. I do love applying makeup.

Since she ended up looking even more stunning than usual that day, I feel she'll listen to me now. So here it is: Your lashes will only hold a little bit of curl, and mascara helps set the curl whether you put it on right before or right after curling. So it comes down to this- if you use the curler after applying mascara, it won't hold any better but it will cause your mascara to clump. So curl first!

And even though you didn't ask, here's my other helpful tip for the day: Apply your concealer after your foundation. Otherwise you just rub off the concealer when you apply the foundation. Plus it's easier to blend the two when you put the concealer on last. If you don't believe me, just try it. You can thank me later.